Being and working within the realms of “empowerment”, I have noticed an area where shame is held because I didn’t show up as a “fully empowered woman”.

Empowerment is a massive buzz word in this new age field…I also use it a lot, yes it is fucking great to feel empowered, it’s also a great word for marketing too…..


To give authority to oneself. To be autonomous. To be free to choose and control what happens to oneself. To be confident, strong and give oneself permission to live in one’s highest potential.


But sometimes one cannot be these things all the time.

Sometimes we have to dwell in the realms of non-empowered expression and be really honest about our descending into those places.

How else is one to know what an empowered state is if they haven’t also rolled around in the gold-coloured pig shit of disempowerment?

How can I know empowerment when I don’t also know the power of self-abasement?

To hold up the status of “an empowered person” takes a lot of work!

Those thoughts that put you down. That comparison complex that has you weighing up your worth next to another.

It could also look like pretending your life, your marriage, your family are all great when really, you are hiding the shit storm that is your life behind those thin beige coloured walls.

It hurts to pretend to have it all together…and that hurt slowly poisons your life if not processed, released, talked about, expressed!

If left stagnant the strain of holding together, your perfect smile will eat you alive by turning you into what you fear most.

The expectations of having your shit together.
The expectations you put on others to have their shit together.

The deep deep shame of not being the perfect model of “empowerment”…

Not having the perfect Instagram life

Not being the most beautiful or handsome person in the possy

Not being the most empowered feminine yoga chick

Not having the house and car you dream of

Not having the partner the movies tell you is waiting for you somewhere..out there

Not being orgasmic or being able to get a hard-on

Not living the dream by attaining a career you love showing up for everyday

That’s ALOT of weight to hold, that’s a lot of shame to be buried inside.


It is ok to not feel empowered…. it really is!

Life is a journey of discovery..don’t fall for the illusion you need to be perfect all the days because you don’t.

You are human, everyone is a mess in different ways, everyone has their own beautiful version of fucked-up.

REAL Self-love starts with accepting the realness of YOU first…in all your versions of empowerment and non-empowerment!

To accept yourself where you are at in any given moment and to have compassion for yourself in that place.

In some areas in your life, you will feel empowered..and in others, you won’t…we all need to have room to grow towards somewhere.

To truly love the disempowered aspects of your life is a revolutionary act.

Be a revolutionary.