The fetishisation of YOUTH is such a regressive distortion of all that life is here to spiritually teach us.
It not only contributes to a state of misery, shame & regret for the person ageing but it also creates isolation, loneliness and a feeling of worthlessness because when there is attachment to this obsession with what looks & feels youthful, we detract attention away from what true WISDOM is; the kind of wisdom only attained by living a long full life and where the initiation rites along the way have been honoured.
As a woman ages, she often becomes more “masculine” through the natural decline of her estrogen levels.
As a man ages, he often becomes more “feminine” through the natural decline of testosterone.
When women reject the natural progression of ageing they miss the opportunity of stepping into their full unstoppable crone witchy power as an elder and wise woman. These women often become more outspoken, more bossy, more willing to step forward.
When men reject the natural progression of ageing they miss the opportunity of welcoming their full sage with a more soft and perceptive intelligence as an elder, they become more sensitive to community and leading the young from heart.
I see this is as a beautiful natural progression of the wisdom keepers, a true example of the cyclical nature of life turning around on itself.
I very much saw the handicapping of male sexuality when I worked as a “contemporary Tantrika”.
So many older men who were holding onto their 18 year old sexual self, lost and out of touch with the wisdom of the NOW and a real non acceptance of the inevitable reality of who they had become.
Women promote and engage the distortion of feminine youth, it’s clear as day the collective obsession with youngness that is not only perpetuated by the “male gaze”. It is all around us, we are ALL doing this though what we buy, follow, how we talk, how we relate to young girls, how we relate to ourselves, the advertising we condone and so on.
Disturbingly this obsession with youth by both men & women also promotes hebephillia, where “mostly” Mens sexual preferences remain in a state of immaturity even as “he” ages remaining fixated on the pubescent young because of a starvation of internal erotic innocence (which is an internal state available to all people of all ages).
It is important to understand the distinction between hebephillia and pedophillia.
Hebephilia is more able to be corrected through information and therapy bringing the person into coordination with the cultures moral through understanding the traumatic effects of sexualizing young girls while pedephillia is more of a deep seeded sickness stemming from gross trauma and abuse, stunting the persons natural brain/emotional development, often unable to be undone.
And whilst men are primarily wired to be attracted to fertile “shine” it is ignorant to scapegoat this primal behaviour as men are absolutely not slaves to such an ancient animal programming unlike some psychotic misogynists like to proclaim.
The high and intelligent masculine man who has faced his programming, trauma and deep intelligence recognises the regressive farce and consequences of projecting their erotic desires onto those not ripe or ready to engage in full consensual erotic relating.
This quality of man knows through his wise perception and contained sexuality, the severity of damage caused by a lack of sexual integrity.
Subtle and not so subtle abuses happen and continue to happen continuously because of the lacking of honest sexual and emotional education imparted upon humanity.
The high masculine understands clean containment and internal stillness when it comes to his erotic energy.
The high masculine recognises his rightful place of service as PROTECTOR of wombs rather than ABUSER of wombs.
And yet still it’s not just on the men!
The entirety of society enables and encourages this fetishisation by subscribing to this youthful obsessive programming and allowing such blurry lines and weak energetic boundaries around healthy sexual relating.
This is why abuse upon abuse over generations have been “hush hushed” by the masses for so long because most people never wanted to confront “uncle johns” seedy behaviour & turned a blind eye on their own instincts and intuition.
To face this level of self-responsibility and to confront such deep sexual shames means looking at how we ourselves, our families & the collective have and continue to make agreements around what we accept as “the norm”.
To look at what has been and is happening with more shrewdness and how we individually and as a collective have enabled such behaviours, has just been to painful for most to confront.
And yet this is why I believe it is only recently that people have really started to confront the atrocities of sexual abuses of the young on a mass scale, it has simply been to painful and gross to confront and it makes complete sense that the church was to be “burnt” on the world stage for its sexual abuses of the young before anyone else.
The church and it’s failures in sufficiently educating humans on sex when they demanded it was their place to do so, but rather promoted sexual repression through fear mongering; has a lot to do with why these behaviours are running in the first place.
We as humanity need to shift our relationship to aging and begin to see that it is a privilege and a beautiful opportunity to experience the powerful journey of growing old including the sexual evolution’s we go through.
So much dysfunction comes from the unacceptance of age, and the “stealing” from the youth to feel alive, worthy and whole again.
Ageing requires the facing of loss, the loss of life and yet modern humans reject loss like nothing else; death is barely honoured by most modern & western cultures and yet life is grasped upon by starved hands.
The placing of the crone and the sage back on the altar is life affirming through the acknowledgement of the wisdom gained through facing and mining the rewards of loss.
To recognise that the young is not the prize of life, but rather the whole experience is.
When we balance our reverence for all stages of the human journey, a great balance will be restored.
While of course individual humans will never be refined to the point of perfection and all abuses never eradicated (it is naive to believe in such a utopia) we can certainly collectively work towards such agreements & values through our individual actions.
We all need to look at what subtle ways we are condoning the fetishization of the young on a everyday basis, and that is EVERYONE!
It may be in that throw away comment about “the old hag”.
It might be the ways in which you expect your ageing husband or wife to show up and fuck you like they are 22, shaming them when they cant.
It may be through the resistance of embracing the spiritual awakening of menopause.
It might come through all the young shiny influencers you follow on social media lacking healthy and real examples of age diversity.
There is so sooo many ways we condone this fetishization and it is going to require a mass cultural cleansing to bring into heath and respect of the great gift it is to be honoured and adored where you are at; no matter what your age.